You would think that with the amount of absentee fathers in today's society that things would change, that males would want to be different and not want to be just another statistic . The fact of the matter is that nothing has changed and as long as this is a trend, nothing will change. The rate in which teen pregnancies occur is beyond unacceptable. Young men are going into these situations blind. The blame can be spread between many things such as lack of parental support or knowledge in general. If things are going to change, parents must be more progressive in educating and raising their sons. In today's society we can not even preach abstinence, because now pre-marital sex is the thing to do. We have to preach safe sex, the use of condoms and contraceptives. There needs to be an established greater sense of responsibility and accountability for our actions and behaviors. We must no longer allow this behavior to go unnoticed, children deserve fathers and boys growing into men need to learn to be responsible.
I completely agree with your blog. I have watched basically all of the 16 and pregnant episodes and teen mom episodes since they began, and out of all the fathers, I can think of very few that have been good fathers. Some fathers come around more in teen mom. For instatnce, in the season of teen mom that is on TV now, Adam, who is now Chelsea's boyfriend again and is the father of their baby Aubrey, has finally come around after the child turned 9 months. It is good that he is around now, but he missed 9 months of his own childs life. Males definetly need to be taught responsibility and need to understand contraception better before the problem of fathers not being around gets better. A child really need to have a father around.
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ReplyDeleteASHLEE REECE SAYS:
ReplyDeleteFelicia's episode caught my attention as well. Outside of Maci I think Felicia had the least support from father of her child. This disturbed both me and my boyfriend who happened to be listeneing in on the show. I saw that Felicia made a series of mistakes which I feel should be openly discussed to teens who are not mature enoguh to make the best decisions for their unborn children. First, the father of her child convinced her to move out of her parent's home which truly disconnected her from stable financial support. this is a mistake a lot of young moms make thinking that if they move into an apartment with their boyfriends then it will make everything ten times better. What ended up happeneing in the episode is normal. Since the guy is paying the cost to be the boss, he does whatever it is he wants to do including staying out late, leaving his girlfriend home alone for unacceptable hours of the day to "chill", and sometimes not coming home at all. This is a great example of why pregnant teens need to live with their parents during their pregnancy so that they are not alone in a house with no resources. Another thought that Chasidy brings up is the fact that safe sex needs to be promoted more than abstinence b/c sex is "the thing to do" now amongst not only teens, but everyone. If teens are more aware and have easy, confidential, affordable access to contraception and knowledge then many teen pregnancies may be prevented. As far as males being absent in the household, especially males of minority; that's a social issue. there is a disconnect b/w boys and men amongst society b/c the men are not raising their boys; the women are. It's almost a lost cause to expect the same manly duties from a man who had both parents in the home vs. one with an absent parent. I'm not speaking for all men, but just in general. There needs to be parenting programs that come along with teen pregnancy b/c sometimes they don't always have the best examples around them to learn from. There was a comment made after the birth of a child in one of the episodes from a teen father that said, "Does it come with directions?" The answer is no! Raising a child does not come with directions and its really a trial and error kind of job. It's a shame what is happening to teens and children ebing born by them, but really all we can do is keep preaching.
I agree that disappearing fathers are a trend. Young adults learn from the people around them and if they see there brothers or their friends or even there own fathers abandoning their responsibility, they will not get the importance of them helping throughout the child's life. Nobody wants to be tied down at such a young age but life happens, and when it does it is not fair or morally right for just the girl to have consequences. Having sex is like an unspoken contract that if anything were to happen there would forever be a tie between those two people. If boys are not prepared to have that tie for the rest of their lives then they need to plan ahead and realize that the person they are when they're 16 is not the person they will be in 20 years, and having a child so young will reorganize their whole life and have a lasting effect.
ReplyDelete^ that post was Maggie Anderson's. I forgot to add my name.
ReplyDeleteI agree that parents need to educate their children. If a teen does not know about sex, they don't know how to be safe. Parents can't expect them to know how to be safe. I do, however, think that HOW parents talk to their kids about sex is important. They should be able to discuss it openly but parents should talk to their kids as parents, not as their best friend. Teens need to understand how to be safe but also understand that sex has meaning. You can be safe with your body but careless with your feelings. Parents should stress that sex is ok before marriage if it is the right choice for them and they're ready. I have seen parents that talk to their teens about sex like it is nothing but just a physical act. This gives the teen the idea that there are no emotions tied to it when really there are many emotions involved. Parents should help them prepare for that as well. If they fully understand how sex can affect their life, I think they will be better equipped to make the right decision for themselves.
ReplyDeleteWHEN parents start talking to their kids about sex is also important. I think high school is the appropriate time. This is when sex becomes a bigger topic in their lives. If it's happening they should know about it.
Overall, it is definitely important for parents to talk to their kids about sex. It is their responsibility to initiate this discussion because in almost every situation, the teen will not feel comfortable. I wish my parents had talked to me about sex. It was a very taboo subject that was never to be discussed. I had this idea that sex was scary and bad but really it's because I did not know about it. My parents could have helped me with that.
-Madeline Schroeder